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The Consuming Nothing... 2002-04-21 - 8:06 p.m. [Music: Smashing Pumpkins - Blue Skies Bring Tears] This is just not good at all. Now I rmemeber why they used to call me Dark Forgotten. ~sighs~ Am I so easy to forget? Was I so shy? So quiet? So...invisible? It hurts more than any cut or gash or scrape ever could. My heart burns with it. I am not memorable...I am all too easily forgotten and I weep in self-pity. Do you know how pathetic this makes me feel inside? Damn the band, damn Naugatuck...damn it all...No one ever remembers me. And yet I sit here and recall all the faces and the beautiful words and promises... Condemned. And my art suffers, and my writing too. I am nothing anymore. Even this self imposed servitude...I can't do it right anymore either...and prehaps I never did it right in the first place. I don't feel that I have ever helped anyone...I am really and truly useless when they need me so what use am I? My face is hot, throat is dry, eyes water...I feel that i've been through this over and over. And maybe I have... I don't know what I want anymore..what to do anymore...I try so hard to change and to be what people want me to be...because I don't know who I am.~sighs~ I just don't know. ~Angel in Runes~